The Red Sox tried.

So did Mitt Romney.

Kamala Harris.

The 2007 Patriots.

Walter Mondale.

Mike Dukakis.

Every Republican to run for the U.S. House in Massachusetts in the 21st Century.

BlackBerry.

Zayre.

Caldor.

Howard Johnson’s.

Clay Aiken.

Every Bruins team but one since 1972.

They all tried.

But once you reach 5th grade, you are no longer graded on effort. Effort is non-variable in life’s equation. It is the minimum cover charge for survival and success.

Effort means nothing without a deal in sales. No employer has ever given the runner-up for a job two weeks’ vacation for his/her/their effort. The same holds for countless actors and actresses whose careers never made it past a second audition. Athletes who never survived cut-down day. Kids who apply to colleges who reject them. Or every guy when they get swiped left.

George Lucas spoke for the universe when he wrote these words for Yoda: “Do. Or do not. There is no try.”

That so many members of Red Sox State Run Media, wannabes in the blogosphere, and fans, are willing to credit the Red Sox for their alleged offer of $700 million over 15 years for the services of Juan Soto is a telling reason why ownership has happily settled into the safe space of mediocrity.

Soto went to the Mets for $765 million. Tuesday, the Red Sox were outbid by the New York Yankees for the services of left-handed pitcher Max Fried. Mad Max is getting an 8-year, $218 million deal. This time, Boston fell “just” one-year and $50 million short.

Red Sox fans get another kick in the “A” for effort. John W. Henry has almost spent $1 billion this offseason – without dropping a single dime. Brilliant.

Henry long bailed on those who had fattened his wallet and the spread sheets of Fenway Sports Group. His appearance at the 2023 Winter Weekend in Springfield triggered a peasant uprising that rivaled Shay’s Rebellion. It pushed Henry into a Howard Hughes-eque sort of exile. Presumably without the jars full of urine.

Henry has moved on to the Nantucket Christmas Stroll and golf without apology. And why should he? The “suckers and losers” who are so happy to buy into the “we tried” narrative on Soto and Fried give Henry license to change nothing when it comes to his baseball team.

The Red Sox remain always one year behind the curve on “market value.”

It happened with Mookie Betts ahead of the 2019 season. Thus, he was a goner before 2020. The Red Sox offered Xander Bogaerts what amounted to a one-year, $30 million extension when it mattered in early 2022. Two years ago at the Winter Meetings, Boston offered Bogaerts a 6-year, “roughly” $162 million extension. At the time, Bogaerts was turning 31. It was too late. Had Boston made Bogaerts that $27 million AAV offer before the 2022 season, he too, would have likely happily taken it.

The Padres landed Bogaerts with an 11-year, $280 million contract.

At the time, it was considered “crazy” and “way too much money” for someone in his 30s.

The deal that Boston allegedly offered Soto would have paid him $466 million AFTER he turned 30.

These days, Bogaerts and Betts are 2 of the best bargains in baseball.

The same sycophants who lectured us about it being “INSANE!!!” to offer Betts or Bogaerts what they eventually received, now want to award Boston the “2024 MLB Offseason Participation Trophy” for its valiant efforts in not signing Soto or Fried.

Imagine if the Red Sox just one year ago had offered Shohei Ohtani the 15-year, $700 million deal they allegedly offered Soto? Ohtani would co-own the City of Boston with the Jays, especially given his tie-in with New Balance.

The Red Sox have never made any of the hypothetical offers discussed above for one simple reason – the player involved would have likely accepted it.

It was easy for the Red Sox to offer Soto $700 million in Monopoly money when they had 0.0% chance of outbidding Steve Cohen. The owner of the Mets is worth $21.5 billion. He once pled guilty to insider trading and paid $1.8 billion in fines. That’s 10 years of the Red Sox current payroll – give or take a few million – in fines.

Is Soto “worth” $765 million?

Yes, because Cohen was willing to pay him $765 million.

The Red Sox lack the will and the means to compete for the best available players each year. If they only admitted to that things would be so much easier for us all.

Pitcher Corbin Burnes and third baseman-shortstop Alex Bregman have become the latest Hot Stove opiate for the masses. We’re told there are grumblings between Red Sox management about Bregman.

Still, someone needs to pick up the innings lost by the likely departure of Nick Pivetta. Bregman bats from the right side. He is a Gold Glover once drafted by the Red Sox. He would presumably stabilize the left side of the infield. (Sort of like Bogaerts did). But his 2024 OPS and home run numbers were lower than the departed Tyler O’Neill’s.

There’s some good news.

Fenway Fest is coming to the MGM Music Hall on Jan. 11.

Pitchforks and torches are optional.

Admission includes unfettered “behind-the-scenes” access for all.

“Young Red Sox fans can enjoy interactive games, appearances from Wally the Green Monster and his sister Tessie, and activities in the concourses, including face painting, Big League Brian, and more!”

Can Big League Brian play second base?

This year’s Fenway Fest “special guest” is … Greg Whiteley. He directed the upcoming Netflix docuseries about the 2024 Red Sox.

Among the titles under consideration:

“Nine Men Out”

“Moneybawl”

“E-6”

“Damn Red Sox”

It’s “Damn Red Sox” here until further notice.

Bill Speros (@RealOBF and @BillSperos on X) can be reached at bsperos1@gmail.com.