Q. My divorce agreement requires me to keep my ex-wife on my employer-provided health insurance so long as I am able, and she is supposed to pay the cost to me to keep her insured.  The cost is pretty high – $750 per month and is increasing to almost $800 per month on Jan.1.  My open enrollment period closes Thanksgiving week.

The agreement requires her to pay me for her share of the insurance by the first of each month and if she fails to pay for three months in a row, I can remove her from my insurance.

She regularly falls behind but then sends me a payment a week before I would be able to remove her.  Right now, she owes me two months, but I guarantee by Dec. 1 she will have paid me for September, so I won’t be able to remove her.  I pay my $2,500 monthly alimony on time, but my lawyer says I am in contempt if I take the insurance out of the alimony.  Do I have to enroll her on my insurance for next year?

A. If you don’t want to be in contempt, you have to enroll her on your insurance for next year.  However, I do not see why you cannot get permission to deduct what she owes you from the alimony you are paying her.  Start by reaching out to her directly – email is the best method.  Provide her with documentation of the increase effective Jan. 1.  Let her know that you cannot continue to pay her alimony on time if she is constantly failing to timely pay for her health insurance, especially with the rising costs.  Ask if she wants to get something cheaper for next year on her own but stress the enrollment deadline you face.

Assuming she wants to remain on your plan, tell her if she doesn’t start paying on time, you will ask the court to let you deduct the insurance from her alimony to avoid this ongoing problem.  Maybe you will get lucky and she will agree in which case you can sign a simple agreement, fill out some simple joint petition for modification forms and submit it for administrative allowance to the court.

If she ignores you or tells you to pound sand, I suggest you file a complaint for contempt against her.  She is still in violation of the agreement to pay you by the first of the month even if you cannot remove her from the insurance.  Ask the court to order her to pay all the arrears and order that going forward you be allowed to deduct her insurance from your monthly alimony.

Email questions to whickey@brickjones.com