Good news: Red Sox owner John Henry is alive, ambulatory, and alert.

Bad news: Henry doesn’t plan to sell the Red Sox today, tomorrow, or perhaps ever.

Henry was the subject of a nearly 6,000-word in-depth profile/puff piece/outsourced-PR release in the Financial Times that hit the interwebs Friday. The “Beatlemaniac college dropout” spent parts of the past year lending his time and presence to the story, answering multiple direct questions via email.

The piece is must-read.

“My wife and I live and work in Boston. We are committed to the city, the region. So the Sox are not going to come up for sale. We generally don’t sell assets,” Henry said.

The Globe’s Racial Wealth Gap and Great Divide Educational Inequity teams can keep their safe space.

That Henry used the term “assets” when asked about selling the Red Sox confirms what’s been laid out here for years.

The Red Sox are nothing more than a line on a spreadsheet to their owners.

But don’t take it too personally. We learned that Henry has a knack for new “quests” — his third wife’s words — when things get stale. His first two wives might confirm that, as well.

Henry pondered a sale of his soccer team two years ago but bailed. Once LeBron James retires, look for Fenway Sports Group to go all-in on buying an NBA franchise.

Wyc, save us!

Henry mocked the Boston fanbase for not sharing his ability to completely emotionally detach from a team many have irrationally loved as far back as their earliest childhood memories.

“Because fans expect championships almost annually, they easily become frustrated and are not going to buy into what the odds actually are: one in 20 or one in 30,” Henry said.

Translation: Teams win. Teams lose. And I’ll have lunch. (RIP Lou Gorman).

Today, the Red Sox are 130-1 to win the World Series at DraftKings, not 30-1. Even according to Henry’s own metric, the Red Sox are underperforming in 2024 on a scale of 4.33 to 1.

The FT’s Vulcanesque version of Henry stands in statuesque contrast to what the Red Sox and State Run Media sell on a daily basis. Tom Werner pitches “full throttle.” NESN bombards us with feel-good ads, 2004 flashbacks, and “everything is awesome” analysis.

Wally never sleeps.

You can love the Red Sox all you want, but John W. Spock will never love you back.

He can’t.

Nor will J.W. Spock speak to you after you ran him off the MGM Springfield stage in 2023.

It’s just not logical since his own words will be used against him.

Unlike Henry, the OG Spock — Leonard Nimoy — was from Boston. He even Tweeted his love of Tom Brady just months before his passing.

There was news nestled amid FT’s fawning prose. Henry hatched his plan to save golf during the 2023 MLB owners meeting.

The red flag could cover the entire Green Monster. Henry was so disinterested in the goings on of the Red Sox and MLB, that during the one meeting set aside to address the concerns of the sport, he was brainstorming ways to prevent the PGA Tour from being fully co-opted by the co-sponsors of 9-11.

Credit to Henry and his fellow Strategic Sports Group billionaires — including Celtics owner Wyc Grousbeck — for offering pro golfers a reasonable financial alternative from the Saudi Kingdom’s Public Investment Fund. But that doesn’t help the Red Sox.

The FT piece confirmed speculation that the millions Fenway Sports Group committed to salvaging the PGA Tour came at the direct expense of the Red Sox, and other FSG “assets.”

Eleven teams spent more than the Red Sox — $54.9 million — in free agents this offseason. The Red Sox overall payroll ranks 12th in MLB. While that sells in San Francisco, it flops in Boston.

Instead of going all-in on Jordan Montgomery, Henry rolled with Jordan Spieth.

Meanwhile, Wyc dropped $303 million on Jaylen Brown last year. He’ll lay out another $315 million to keep Jayson Tatum this summer.

Henry’s “eyes it up” when the author of the FT piece wanted to discuss Strategic Sports Group’s $3 billion investment in golf. Henry’s FSG is a principal component of that group.

Related Articles

John Henry says he won’t sell Red Sox, suggests fans hold unrealistic expectations

Column: John Henry says Red Sox fans have unrealistic expectations, but he set them

“He looked delighted to be asked about what he described as a fascinating new project, but the bustle of the official start of the Red Sox season cut us short.”

That damn baseball team always gets in the way.

Henry may be enshrined in Cooperstown, if not the MFA. On his watch, the Red Sox became the MLB gold-standard. Boston ended four-score and six years of misery across New England in 2004. Three more World Series trophies made up for lost time. Henry, Werner, and the late, great Larry Lucchino also transformed Fenway Park into the biggest ATM in town outside of Beacon Hill. This ownership group also ended the scourge of the Red Sox’ monochromatic past.

(Even though the team had no black ballplayers on its 2021 Opening Day roster).

Henry owes you nothing.

Conversely, you own him even less.

Just like Jersey Street, apathy runs two ways.

Bill Speros (@RealOBF and @BillSperos on X) can be reached at bsperos1@gmail.com.