“Before we get started, I just wanted to kind of say that I’ve had some fans reach out to me and tell me that they’re disappointed in me, and I just wanted to let them know that I’m sorry for my actions and that I’m gonna work on being better for them.”

That was how Jarren Duran greeted the media in the clubhouse on Monday afternoon, moments after the Red Sox announced that, effectively immediately, he was suspended without pay for two games.

Less than 24 hours before, the outfielder had responded to a heckling fan with an expletive and homophobic slur during their Sunday afternoon game. Duran said he knew instantly he was in the wrong.

“Yeah, I actually apologized to the umpire in the catcher for my actions because they were right there, they heard me say it,” Duran said. “I’m assuming they cut the mic because of my inappropriate words so it wasn’t picked up, but I know that I was apologizing to them for the word I had said.”

The fan had been “heckling me the entire game,” Duran said when asked to provide context for his outburst. “I just let the moment get the best of me.”

He said he wasn’t trying to be hateful or homophobic.

“There was no intent behind the word that was used,” he said. “It was just the heat of the moment and just happened to be said, you know, it’s just, it’s on me for that word coming out.”

Because NESN’s cameras and microphones caught the exchange, the Red Sox became aware of the incident almost immediately. They spoke with Duran, and had what Red Sox CEO and president Sam Kennedy described as a “very heavy discussion” with league officials. As the clip began to go viral on social media on Sunday evening, the club released a pair of statements, one from Duran and one of their own. They arranged for media availabilities with Duran, Kennedy, chief baseball officer Craig Breslow, and manager Alex Cora before Monday night’s game.

“I think Jarren, from conversations last night and today, I think understands and recognizes the severity of what he said,” Kennedy said during his and Breslow’s joint availability.

MLB often metes out the punishment in such cases, but the Red Sox felt it needed to come from them.

“We as an organization felt like this behavior, this incident warranted a strong response,” Breslow said. He also acknowledged that because it was a team punishment, rather than a league decision, the Red Sox won’t have to carry a 25-man roster.

In addition to MLB’s mandatory training, Red Sox players and employees at all levels of the organization undergo their own additional diversity, equality, and inclusion training every year.

“I think it is striking evidence that while we may have made strides and done great work, we haven’t done nearly enough. I think an incident like this is an important reminder that there’s still a ton of progress that needs to be made,” Breslow said. “And at the same time, I think we can acknowledge that Jarren has shown himself to be immediately accountable and is striving to do better, and we all can connect with that.”

“We’ve worked really hard over these past two and a half decades to make sure that Fenway Park is a place where everyone feels welcome,” Kennedy said. “We need to hold people accountable when things like this happen.”

Asked how he felt about being suspended, Duran said that wasn’t what mattered. “Trying to be better and learn from my mistake of what I said, is the most important thing right now,” he said.

Cora made it clear he agreed with the suspension, which brought his leadoff man’s streak of starting every game this season to an end at 116. “The reason he’s not gonna play 162 is the right one,” he said.

Like Breslow and Kennedy, Cora described the incident as a “mistake” more than once.

“He made a big mistake and he’s living with it,” Cora said. “I totally believe the kid made a mistake,” was his response to another question.

“There’s a lot of work that we have to do. Not only Jarren as a person, but us as a group, and we will do that,” Cora said. However, he explained that he didn’t feel an official team meeting was necessary, because such conversations were already happening organically. “They talk as a group.”

Amidst a breakout season, Duran has emerged as a team leader and face of the franchise. But in that regard, his tendency to self-flagellate was on display. He said he “earned” the hateful messages he’s received on social media, and was trying to distance himself from his teammates.

“A lot of fans were just commenting on my pictures and stuff like that and telling me about – horrible things about myself,” Duran said. “I guess I earned that by saying a word that I shouldn’t be saying.”

“I’m a terrible leader. I know, I shouldn’t have said that word, and I know I’m gonna get looked down on for saying it, and it’s my own fault because I brought it upon myself,” Duran said. “I haven’t really interacted with my teammates, I’ve kind of just been trying to keep my space from them. I don’t want to bug them with something that I did, and I don’t want to get them wrapped up in all this. So it’s, it’s on me, it’s my fault, and I just need to be better.”

Hearing Duran’s self-assessment, his manager disagreed. “Terrible?” Cora asked. “I don’t see him as a terrible leader. He just made a mistake.”

“I don’t think it compromises who he is in the clubhouse,” Cora said. “It’s not the same clubhouse as 24 hours ago. We know where we’re at as a group and where he’s at as a person, but I don’t think things are gonna change the way they see him. … I think we’re gonna be okay.”

Breslow and Kennedy, too, pointed to Duran being quick to apologize and take accountability as an example of leadership.

“Really difficult day, disappointing, unacceptable event yesterday,” Kennedy said. “But I’m proud of the way the organization immediately addressed it and proud of Jarren for acknowledging… his mistake and being accountable. But tough day.”

“It is complicating, it’s disappointing and frustrating,” Breslow said. “I think at the same time we see that Jarren is a leader, that he maybe is also flawed. And we all are. And people make mistakes. … What matters is what happens now and the consequential steps that Jarren takes toward repairing his relationship, not just with his teammates and the organization, but with the LGBTQ community.”

Duran’s salary for the duration of the suspension will be donated to PFLAG (Federation of Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays), an LGBTQ+ support, education, and advocacy organization. He said he and the Red Sox would discuss next steps Monday and in the coming days.

“What I would like to see is more education, more understanding, more open dialogue around the really negative impact of hate speech and homophobic slurs that are just not acceptable, at all levels: player, community, front office, our fans. It’s a constant education,” Kennedy said. “Jarren, he said something he shouldn’t have, he made a bad mistake, he’s owned it, he’s now been suspended. But I think there’s more work to be done in terms of rebuilding trust and encouraging his teammates and everyone in the sports community to be better and to continue to encourage all of us to remind each other what’s acceptable and what’s not acceptable.”