Q. I have a great boyfriend I love very much. We work together — he’s an executive — and even though we aren’t supposed to be dating, the attraction was just too strong. We have been working together for four months and dating for three. He is such a great guy; I can see myself with him forever.

However, today, when he walked into work, I noticed he was wearing a wedding ring. He had an early Zoom meeting and went directly into his office. When the meeting was over and he came out, we chatted for a while, and I noticed he was no longer wearing the ring. He just told me he loved me last night! Is there any other explanation other than he is married? I can’t think of one. What is good ex-etiquette?

A. Unfortunately, I can’t think of one, either. And the fact that he removed the ring before he spoke to you speaks volumes. So many red flags. You may be too in love right now to see them.

First one, this is calculated, and he is fully aware that he is betraying not just one woman, but two. Consider his character.

Second red flag, he is your superior at work. There are reasons why this kind of relationship may be forbidden at your place of employment. The power imbalance can raise concerns about coercion, such as pressure to stay in the relationship to keep one’s job.  He also knew this all while “the attraction was so strong.” He is obviously not the man you thought he was.

There is actually one ex-etiquette rule to consider for situations like this, rule No. 8. Good Ex-etiquette Rule No. 8 reminds us to be honest and straightforward in all our interactions. That means, even if your boyfriend isn’t being honest, that doesn’t mean you can’t be.

So as much as you love this guy and you want to have a future with him, know that there is no future with someone who is so deceptive. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again. That’s good ex-etiquette.

Dr. Jann Blackstone is a child custody mediator and the author of “The Bonus Family Handbook: The Definitive Guide to Co-parenting and Creating Stronger Families.”/Tribune News Service